I have a good excuse...I promise!

I know. I have been missing. But honestly I have been busy.

It's hard work to get a promotion, piss off my mother-in-law, throw a shower, plan and go on vacation, and maintain 3 1/2 boys one of which has decided it is time to be demanding and mobile (not always The Idiot-but he adds to the situation).

First off, I got a promotion. There is a long story behind it but basically I was stuck where I was because there was no place for me to go. But I know you are all dying to get to the pissing off the MIL part so I will skip ahead.

So we went on the 19th to get our anatomy ultrasound. The Idiot was less than ecstatic. I think the ultrasounds make it more real to him, thus triggering another stroke (let's hope not). I already had our pregnancy announcements printed and ready to go. We told the ultrasound tech we weren't sure if we wanted to know so I asked her to write it down and we would decide later.

The ultrasound tech put the wand on my belly at the top and measured the legs and I could see his boy pieces. I asked The Idiot if he saw it and he said he had no idea what he was looking at. I am sure he can't recognize his own man bits on a blurry screen so it really didn't surprise me.

The tech also tried to tell me my boy was the size of a soda can. BULL! I look bigger than my SIL who is due a week from today and I still have 4 months to go. The Idiot keeps looking at me, scoffs and turns away. I am guessing he is getting pretty worried as the days progress.

We hot footed it to Walmart and copied a 3D picture of his face to put in the pregnancy announcements and he took them to the post office. I wanted everyone to get the news before my SIL's shower at my house on the 21st. Plan was successful and mission accomplished.

Oh was the MIL mad. She called my BIL while I was on the phone with my SIL and I listened to her on speaker phone talk and talk about how our newest addition is surely "an accident" and how her youngest was an accident and my BIL told her it didn't matter. It was still a person and she was being silly. I didn't add the fact that we were having a boy to the announcement because we didn't know until right before I mailed them off. So he asked her if she knew and she said no and he said oh. And then my SIL started talking to me again.

So I was tired and ready to sleep for the shower the next day and the MIL decides that 10:30pm is the opportune time to call and let us know via voicemail that she knows I am having twins. She said she could see feet and hands and another head (I am sure she could see Moses and Jimmy Hendrix partying in the picture too considering all of the meds she is on). I just erased the message and went back to bed. The Idiot was already asleep.

Next day she waits until 2 hours before the shower to call TI's cell and bug him about it. Thus getting him upset which makes me upset. I have realized that she really pisses me off when she gets her sons worked up. So I told my SIL that I was going to let her have it when she talked to me. But I wouldn't ruin her shower, I was just going to make her shut-up before it really started.

The scene, I am sitting on the kitchen floor trying like hell to get Beebo to eat before he took off with Dad and his Uncle for a day away from the guys and she walk in and says, "Well I guess I should say congratulations..." I retorted, "Yeah right!" She had an aghast look on her face and I went off.

"First of all you will not come in my house and talk shit about me or YOUR grandchildren. All children are blessings. There are several people in the world who cannot have children and those that try like hell to have children and just can't. If you do not want anything to do with YOUR grandchildren then don't bother seeing them anymore. And don't you dare say any of my children are accidents...they are people and they have feelings and when they are old enough to realize how ignorant it is to call them an accident I am sure as shit they won't want anything to do with you either."

"All of my boys are accidents so I don't see the problem."

"If you want to continue to tell them they are accidents and make them feel like shit and unwanted that is on you but don't you ever, ever call my kids accidents."

"Well, I guess you told me."

"No, I am stating a fact. And our methods of birth control including our sex life are absolutely none of her business."

I haven't talked to her since. She did go tell my FIL and other BIL that I am a terrible bitch and I just don't like her because I keep my house perfect and hers is a hellhole. TI won't let the boys go over there. She has a litter box in every room in her mother's house and it is disgusting. There is cat poo and pee and hoarf and vomit all over mixed in with the litter they kick out of the boxes all over the floor. It is not my fault she is a crazy, filthy, dirty cat lady. Her fingernails are black underneath like she works on cars all day. And she doesn't!

She also keeps telling everyone that she will be in the delivery room when my SIL goes into labor again this month. Is she in for the surprise of her life!

Damit! I had alot more to say and my computer went offline and didn't save. I will post more tomorrow. I need sleepy...