I have recently started a new affair with Jack-in-the-Box Grilled Chicken Clubs. OMG! So good. I get them without cheese or mayo but they are simply to die for. I really was not digging chicken these first couple of months but now I am down. But I will still eat Lion's Choice everyday if I could. Maybe I could switch it up with Jack-in-the-Box one day and Lion's Choice the next.
I feel like I am going to explode out of my drawers! I have a Bella Band on today and I hate it. I have come to my 'simply impossible to be comfortable unless you are wearing yoga pants and a huge tee' stage. I did go to the bathroom earlier and only then was I able to button and clasp my pants! But it was pretty pointless because then my fat gets shoved above the waist of my pants and I then look like a backwards camel with 2 humps up front. If only I could shove it all in my bra!
My SIL and my mother told me I look pregnant. Great...All I need now is to have my MIL insist I am getting fat and then life will be officially miserable. My BIL assured me that I am 'still pretty stretched out' so he is not surprised. Thanks. As if I don't have enough image problems.
We had birthday party for Baboo this weekend and it was sucessful. Only a few nasty comments from the MIL but other than that it was nice. I just wanted to share one of her comments.
Scene: The Idiot and I are standing at the concession stand at our local bowling alley to turn in the kiddos drink orders and MIL shuffles up.
MIL:" So how much does this all cost?"
Me: " Why does it matter? You can't buy it on clearance at Costco so who cares!"
The Idiot: HAHAHA
Much later to my poor unsuspecting 'rents:
MIL: "That rattle used to be The Idiot's so I gave it to them for Beebo. But I didn't buy it at Costco."
My mother was WTFing and my polite father who can't hear, asked her to repeat because of course he didn't hear (I don't see how...she has Rush Limbaugh's deafness from her painkillers addiction and yells at everyone). So she repeated it. I then had to explain to my mother what her idiot comment was about.
I just hope to hide this pregnancy from her as long as possible because she thinks she has to rub your belly as you get bigger. Like shining a bowling ball. Honestly she is the only nutcase to do that. I have to sit there and let it happen for fear The Idiot will be upset with me for not cooperating with her wants and needs (because she is the one who will be uncomfortable for 9 months and her needs are most important). She also likes to stab your baby-incubator with her kitty-litter encrusted fingers. As if it isn't uncomfortable because it's stretched taut that she has to cause you more pain by shoving her dirty long fingernail in your gut.
I am really dreading the day we tell her anything. She was so mad at me for not finding out the gender that she will be on me again this time.
A conversation last September:
MIL: How far along are you?
TI: She is 9 months.
MIL: No she is not.
TI: How far along are you?
Me: 9 months.
MIL: No you are not.
TI and BIL: You are pregnant 10 months, Mom. 40 weeks. 40 weeks is 10 months.
MIL: I don't know where you get your information from!
TI: The doctor.
MIL: Well it must be a man because you are actually pregnant 11 months.
Me: (thinking to myself WTF???? Is she really this crazy and what have I gotten myself into!)
TI: No Mom, you are wrong.
MIL: I would think I would know since I had 3 kids. (While I am standing there) She only has one and she is probably lying about anything that has to do with him. (then to me) What are you going to name that baby?
Me: I don't know we don't even know if we are having a boy or girl.
MIL: Bullshit! You know and you just won't tell me! You are probably going to name that baby Shitpot just to embarrass me!
Me: You're right! I can't name the baby something normal because I named my first Pisspot so they have to match right?
The Idiot was so upset that he actually considered calling her and telling her Shitpot was here if she wanted to visit. I made the phone call to my FIL who relayed the information. But she informed The Idiot the other day that she doesn't remember going to the hospital to see Beebo. I was thinking of convincing The Idiot that we could just pretend like we told her and then when she comes to realize it we just tell her we told her and she forgot!
I think I will just wear parkas for the duration of the summer, sit in my closet, and avoid anything that requires visiting with the out-laws.
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pregnancy. Show all posts
April 14, 2008
March 6, 2008
6 weeks and 2 days, is this pregnancy viable?
I had my first dr.'s appointment yesterday. They weighed me. That is enough to bring anyone to tears. They have a new digital scale which is not fun. I used to think that the weight accumulation was from the nurse’s slight of hand, but now I have no excuse. They made me take the glucose screen because of my weight and I had to tell the story about Beebo’s arrival into the world, again.
I was fortunate enough to not have the women ask if I know how this all happens. I assume everyone working there sees a + test as a $. So they are probably glad that it happened. And due to my ‘condition’ I will have to make frequent visits again this next 2 months. The sad thing is that I still have to pay for my last delivery and that should be done and over with by the end of next month.
So I have been sick and exhausted. Not something that is alarming if you know that you are pregnant and on progesterone tablets. But I find this whole added hormones thing a bit of a mess. See, I called to get the pills the day after I had confirmed the pregnancy myself. They had me come and get blood drawn and told me that they would call if the results were not good. So imagine my surprise when the LNP told me that I was smart to get the pills because my progesterone levels are low. I asked how low.
“15 is the ideal number we stick with around here and yours was 6.9. So we are going to do another blood draw today to check your HCG and your progesterone levels. If you are still below the ideal level we will increase your progesterone dosage.”
Now this worries me a great deal because what if I was meant to miscarry? What if something was not right and I should have just let everything be. Plus they NEVER called me! Hello? Is anyone home? I would know if they called beause a) The Idiot does not answer the phone, b) because The Idiot does not answer the phone he thinks this justifies him not checking voicemail so I check all the voicemail, and c) I WAS WAITING FOR THEM TO CALL! I had a feeling that this was why I had miscarried in 2006 after they informed me while pregnant with Beebo that my progesterone was low. I figured it was imoortant since THEY were freaking out about it last time when it was 12.3. WTF???????
So I kind of calmed down before I blew up (hence the childhood nickname) and I explained my mother’s history with blighted ovum and she said she realized my concern. So she scheduled me for an u/s the next day. So today I have to go back and have my pregnancy confirmed as viable or unviable. So I will sit at work and pretend to pour over numbers and figures and estimates while my brain screams. I am sure I slept last night terribly well. It was probably due to the fact that Christian won Project Runway (I preferred Chris for the final 3) but I think I just stored all of the information in the back of my mind for safe keeping.
The Idiot’s reaction to the news was no reaction because Family Guy re-runs were on and those are far more important than the possibility that I could miscarry again. He has a ‘trick’ were he turns his head slightly in my direction and nods or says, “yeah” when I pause to breath. Eyes are always glued to the tube. I don’t know if it is typical man behavior or just his behavior to have selective hearing.
Baboo’s father and I did not have to compete with the TV for attention because when we moved in together he decided that he was going to get rid of the TV for fear that it would consume him and all of his ultra-intelligent brain power and he had so much to share, let me tell you. I can't recall an intelligent conversation with him to this day. We worked opposite hours so I went home and slept or read and when he was home we had to have sex. So I lived with that man for 3 months with no TV with all the sex I could ever want and more. It's not a wonder I got pregnant with Baboo at all. I still ended up hating him and the ridiculous choices he made in the end but still he didn’t pay attention to me either. Come to think of it, it did take him an awfully long time to read Hannibal. He read that book from the day I moved in to the day I moved out. He must be a slow reader or a great fraud.
I was a little ticked that The Idiot wasn’t too concerned with what I said. I think I will test him this afternoon when I come home from work. I might just mention that I got an ultrasound and that we are having twins or something mind-blowing to see if he even flinches.
The last time I was pregnant, (as if that was long ago), I took a shower in our wonderful modest mobile home. The tub was high so I was to the point of not being able to lift my leg very high and I was worried that I would slip and fall. I swear to this day that I stood in my shower dripping wet, covered with a towel and screamed and hollered The Idiot’s name for a good 5 minutes. He finally showed up and asked me, “what?” This was practiced daily at our house. I was scared that I was going to fall through the rotten floor so he had to help me. I was so mad I asked him if there were boobs and wheels or engines on the TV and if that is why he chose to ignore me. Well, guess what he was watching? Overhaulin. Such an Idiot. I could have been standing there getting ready to have a baby with contractions, leaking the whole nine yards and he wouldn’t come anywhere near me till there was a commercial. So ridiculous.
Men...need I say more?
I was fortunate enough to not have the women ask if I know how this all happens. I assume everyone working there sees a + test as a $. So they are probably glad that it happened. And due to my ‘condition’ I will have to make frequent visits again this next 2 months. The sad thing is that I still have to pay for my last delivery and that should be done and over with by the end of next month.
So I have been sick and exhausted. Not something that is alarming if you know that you are pregnant and on progesterone tablets. But I find this whole added hormones thing a bit of a mess. See, I called to get the pills the day after I had confirmed the pregnancy myself. They had me come and get blood drawn and told me that they would call if the results were not good. So imagine my surprise when the LNP told me that I was smart to get the pills because my progesterone levels are low. I asked how low.
“15 is the ideal number we stick with around here and yours was 6.9. So we are going to do another blood draw today to check your HCG and your progesterone levels. If you are still below the ideal level we will increase your progesterone dosage.”
Now this worries me a great deal because what if I was meant to miscarry? What if something was not right and I should have just let everything be. Plus they NEVER called me! Hello? Is anyone home? I would know if they called beause a) The Idiot does not answer the phone, b) because The Idiot does not answer the phone he thinks this justifies him not checking voicemail so I check all the voicemail, and c) I WAS WAITING FOR THEM TO CALL! I had a feeling that this was why I had miscarried in 2006 after they informed me while pregnant with Beebo that my progesterone was low. I figured it was imoortant since THEY were freaking out about it last time when it was 12.3. WTF???????
So I kind of calmed down before I blew up (hence the childhood nickname) and I explained my mother’s history with blighted ovum and she said she realized my concern. So she scheduled me for an u/s the next day. So today I have to go back and have my pregnancy confirmed as viable or unviable. So I will sit at work and pretend to pour over numbers and figures and estimates while my brain screams. I am sure I slept last night terribly well. It was probably due to the fact that Christian won Project Runway (I preferred Chris for the final 3) but I think I just stored all of the information in the back of my mind for safe keeping.
The Idiot’s reaction to the news was no reaction because Family Guy re-runs were on and those are far more important than the possibility that I could miscarry again. He has a ‘trick’ were he turns his head slightly in my direction and nods or says, “yeah” when I pause to breath. Eyes are always glued to the tube. I don’t know if it is typical man behavior or just his behavior to have selective hearing.
Baboo’s father and I did not have to compete with the TV for attention because when we moved in together he decided that he was going to get rid of the TV for fear that it would consume him and all of his ultra-intelligent brain power and he had so much to share, let me tell you. I can't recall an intelligent conversation with him to this day. We worked opposite hours so I went home and slept or read and when he was home we had to have sex. So I lived with that man for 3 months with no TV with all the sex I could ever want and more. It's not a wonder I got pregnant with Baboo at all. I still ended up hating him and the ridiculous choices he made in the end but still he didn’t pay attention to me either. Come to think of it, it did take him an awfully long time to read Hannibal. He read that book from the day I moved in to the day I moved out. He must be a slow reader or a great fraud.
I was a little ticked that The Idiot wasn’t too concerned with what I said. I think I will test him this afternoon when I come home from work. I might just mention that I got an ultrasound and that we are having twins or something mind-blowing to see if he even flinches.
The last time I was pregnant, (as if that was long ago), I took a shower in our wonderful modest mobile home. The tub was high so I was to the point of not being able to lift my leg very high and I was worried that I would slip and fall. I swear to this day that I stood in my shower dripping wet, covered with a towel and screamed and hollered The Idiot’s name for a good 5 minutes. He finally showed up and asked me, “what?” This was practiced daily at our house. I was scared that I was going to fall through the rotten floor so he had to help me. I was so mad I asked him if there were boobs and wheels or engines on the TV and if that is why he chose to ignore me. Well, guess what he was watching? Overhaulin. Such an Idiot. I could have been standing there getting ready to have a baby with contractions, leaking the whole nine yards and he wouldn’t come anywhere near me till there was a commercial. So ridiculous.
Men...need I say more?
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